BRCA JOURNAL: CHAPTER FIVE

As I unwrapped the candy, I smiled, knowing that I would never let them know otherwise.

Having delivered me safely at home, Couni and Rose returned to their families and my Aunt Gail, cousin Pam and girlfriend Laurie flew in to take their place. I am a very independent person and am usually the last person to accept help; however, I can say with authority that a mastectomy is not a surgery that a person should attempt alone. While I had originally resisted all of their offers of help, it was a tremendous comfort to have them.

Though I wanted to jump back into the mommy role completely, I just couldn’t do it physically. I still had the drains in, and I had to be on heavy doses of pain medication, which caused me to be drowsy. I also couldn’t use my arms fully yet. I was unable to lift my children (a six-week restriction per the doctor’s orders) and had a severely decreased range of motion. Gail, Pam and Laurie helped with the kids, drove me to appointments and helped pass the time with plenty of laughter. Additionally, unbeknownst to me, my friends had gotten together and created a dinner schedule for us. For two weeks upon returning home, one of our friends or family members would bring over a complete dinner for our entire family. It was absolutely amazing. My advice to anyone else having a mastectomy would be to accept all of the help you are offered – you will never regret it.

The Pathologist Says What?

Eight days after surgery, I returned to my breast surgeon’s office to have my drains removed. As I waited for her in the examining room, I heard her footsteps approach, then step away before she finally entered ten minutes later. She explained that she had just been paged by the pathology department and it just so happened that they were calling about my pathology report. I was aware that she would be sending the breast tissue she removed to the pathology department after my surgery. What I wasn’t expecting is what she said next.

“Well, it turns out you had DCIS in your left breast.”

“Oh,” I said. “What is DCIS?”

“Cancer.”

It didn’t take but half a second for the tears to start streaming down my face. I cried and cried as she explained that they had found several cancerous areas called ductal carcinoma in situ (DCIS) in the breast, the largest 1.7 centimeters long. “But it was non-invasive and we got it all,” she said. “You won’t need any further treatment – you saved your life.”

I continued to cry and cry. After a few moments she asked, “Are you okay?”

I looked up and almost shouted, “Oh my god, yes! I’m great! Really. I am! This is why I had the surgery in the first place. Thank you, thank you, thank you.” I hugged her with all my heart.

I then had to go get my husband from the waiting room to join us. As we walked back to the examining room where the doctor was waiting, I looked him in the eye and said, “Honey, you aren’t going to believe what you are about to hear, but just know walking in there that I am completely fine.”

His mouth literally dropped open when she repeated what she had told me. He held my hand and wiped away a tear of his own. She spent a lot of time with us describing DCIS, where they found it and why they were so confident that I would require no further treatment. She also shared with us why she believed my MRI and mammograms had failed to detect the cancer. DCIS is a very early stage of cancer, considered to be Stage 0. My cancer probably had not calcified, which is what the tests would normally pick up. It made no difference to me at that point. I was just happy that they had got it all and I would need no further treatment.

Jim and I walked out of the room puffy-eyed, but with sly smiles on our faces, like we had a great secret we were keeping.

Except that it wasn’t a secret for long. I called every person I knew to tell them. I started with the doubters. When I made my decision to have the surgery, so many people thought I was crazy for even considering it. Most of them opined that I should just go in for regular testing. As if I wasn’t already doing that!